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Portland, OR

I exist to help dads learn to communicate and engage with their young adult daughters.  I provide resources from my vast amounts of research and experience with dads and daughters, and this is the place where you'll find the tools you need to become the hero you've always wanted to be.


Water With Words: The Key to Tending Your Daughter's Heart

Michelle Watson

Awhile back I bought four rhododendron plants that were luscious and green. I set them out by my back porch and kept an eye on them to make sure they were getting enough water. Additionally, we had gotten a good douse of rain that particular week (let’s hear it for living in Oregon!) so I figured they were good to go until I planted them. 

However, a few days later I checked on them, assuming they were still doing great, yet was shocked to see that they were barely hanging on. All the leaves were curled in, over half of the bushes had turned yellow, and now the poor plants essentially looked, at best, only half alive. Somehow, with the hot sun over the course of merely a couple of days, the soil had dried up and the plants didn’t get what they needed most: water.

When I wasn’t looking, the plants deteriorated fast.  

Because they needed water and weren’t getting it, they quickly faded and were in a dying process seemingly overnight. I was shocked at how quickly they went from life to death, while on my watch. Here I had planned on giving them a good home, so to speak, and due to my oversight and neglect, they almost didn’t make it.  

But the good news----and the shocking news----is that after one good watering, they sprung back to life in only a few hours. The speedy resurrection process caught me as much by surprise as the original rate of decline, reminding me that water changes everything.

Similarly, your daughter is like these plants. 

With the intensity of the environmental conditions around her, she can fade fast. And if you turn your head and look away for too long, you may be surprised at how quickly she can wither and wilt seemingly overnight, especially when she isn’t being watered with words of kindness, affirmation, encouragement, support, and validation.  

She needs you to “water her heart,” consistently and regularly. By that I mean that she needs you to speak words into her life that are life-breathing and replenishing.

I want to encourage you to be mindful of what you are saying to your daughter on a daily basis. Set your intention toward being a dad who pours refreshing words into the soil of your daughter’s heart so she can withstand the weather conditions around her through every season of the year.  

You, Dad, are a key factor in seeing your daughter flourish. Renew your commitment today to water her heart with your life-breathing words.