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Portland, OR
USA

I exist to help dads learn to communicate and engage with their young adult daughters.  I provide resources from my vast amounts of research and experience with dads and daughters, and this is the place where you'll find the tools you need to become the hero you've always wanted to be.

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25 Things To ALWAYS, AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE, Say To Your Daughter

Michelle Watson

Last week may have felt a bit brutal with me giving you 25 things to never, ever, under any circumstances say to your daughter.

I couldn’t leave you hanging without a guide to lead you back to center court. So, in a similar fashion that uses as few words as possible, is straight forward and to the point, here are 25 things to always, under all circumstances, and as much as possible say to your daughter if you want to be a dialed-in dad.

Here’s a list of what TO say to your daughter:

  • What did I ever do to deserve such an incredible daughter like you?!
  • Do you know how grateful I am to be your dad?!
  • You look so beautiful today
  • You get prettier with each passing year
  • You’re right, I don’t understand you right now but I want to understand. Can you help me understand?
  • I’ll be here for you no matter what. Any time, day or night, I will do my best to be available. You can text or call me when I’m at work or out-of-town and I’ll figure out a way to respond as soon as I can
  • I want you to know that I enjoy you
  • You are going to make a great wife and mother some day (if you choose that)
  • I’ve seen so much growth in you (list specifics)
  • Tell me what you’re learning in school (or work)…I’d love to hear
  • What was good about your day today?
  • What was hard about your day today?
  • God broke the mold when He made you! You are one of a kind!
  • You are completely unique and gifted (list specifics)
  • I love you just the way you are
  • You could never disappointment me, no matter what you do or don’t do, because I love you unconditionally
  • What a treasure you are. Any guy who gets to date you (or eventually marry you) is a very lucky man
  • In my eyes, you are the best of the best
  • I am so proud of you
  • I like who you are
  • I love you
  • You are amazing
  • I look forward to our dates where we get to spend time together, you and me
  • I’m sorry…will you forgive me?
  • I want you to know that no matter what, I will always be your main man

In order to really dial in to your daughter’s heart space it’s going to require hard work and intention. And we all know that nothing worthwhile and valuable is ever easy. Hard work is required in business and this is all about bringing your best work ethic home.

Remember that your view of her, the one that is communicated from your mouth to her ears, will be paramount to the view she carries about herself throughout her life.

I encourage you today to carry this list in your pocket or on your phone and then choose to say one of these things daily to your daughter over the course of the next month. In fact, I've attached a printable handout below listing things not to say, from last week's blog, and things to say from this week's blog...

In closing, Dad, watch what happens in her as a result of your focusing on saying life-giving words. Write and tell me about what takes place in her…and in you. (You can reach me at michelle@theabbaproject.com)

Dad, What to Say (and Not Say) to Your Daughter.PDF

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